Written by: Deepika Sathish,
Published on: 3rd Sep 2025.
Have you ever wondered why certain things hit you harder than they should? Like why a small comment can leave you feeling invisible, or why you sometimes react with a wave of emotion that doesn’t quite match the moment? Maybe it’s not just you reacting—but a younger part of you, still holding on to feelings you didn’t know were still there. That part? That’s your inner child.
Inner child is not just a metaphor. It’s a real part of our subconscious. It’s where most of us forms our core belief, such as belief about self-worth, safety, love and belongings. If our needs hadn't met when we are growing up, lets say emotionally, physically or psychologically, they won’t just get disappeared. They will stay with us as a unmet needs and affect our adult life in ways that we might not even realize.
This is what we call as an inner child wound. It is an emotional injury that had happened in our childhood which has made us to feel unsafe, hurt, unloved and not good enough. Even if these events seems trivial from the outside, it has the potential to leave a long lasting impact on the way you look at yourself, others and the outside world. These kinds of inner wound often come from:
- Feeling not being seen, heard or understood by loved ones.
- Being ignored, abandoned or criticized in every situation .
- Growing up around unstable, neglected and fighting home environment.
- Being told to be strong or perfect all the time.
These experiences stick with us often quietly in our subconscious and shape how we feel and act as adults.
Sometimes it not very obvious that our inner child is hurting. But it might show up in some for of behaviors like :
- Getting easily anxious, upset or withdrawn
- Fear of saying no and engaging in people pleasing attitude
- Feeling like you are too much to handle or not good enough
- Deep fear of rejection or abandonment
- Trouble trusting others or yourself
- Constant self-criticism or perfectionism
Its not that something is wrong with you, its just that your younger self is still carrying the pain that wasn’t completely healed yet.
Some of the techniques which might help you to heal your inner child.
1. Notice What is your Trigger: If something makes you really upset, ask: “How old do I feel right now?” You might feel like a sad 6-year-old or an angry teenager. That’s your inner child speaking up.
2. Talk to Your Inner Child:
Be kind. Imagine you’re talking to your younger self and say:
“I’m here now.”
“You didn’t deserve that.”
“You are safe, and I love you.”
This may feel strange at first—but it works. Your brain and heart listen.
3. Write a Letter: You can write:
To your younger self: “Dear little me…”
From your younger self: “I wish you knew how I felt…”
This helps you understand what you needed and didn’t get as a child.
4. Do Something Fun or Comforting:Think about what you loved as a kid. Drawing, dancing, building with blocks, playing outside, watching cartoons. Let yourself enjoy those things again—just because they make you happy.
5. Be the Parent You Needed:Now that you’re an adult, so take care of yourself. Set healthy boundaries. Rest when you need to. Speak to yourself politely. Ask for help to others when you need it.
Always remember, Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means giving yourself the kindness, love and safety that you should have had all along. Just like that inner child healing is not about blaming others or getting stuck in the past. But it’s all about bringing compassion to the places that still hurt and gently reminding yourself that you are safe now, you are allowed to feel, grow and heal at your own pace.
The most beautiful part? Your inner child doesn’t need you to be perfect. They just need you to show up
